Okay, so you guys don't have to respond to this unless you feel the need to. This is basically where when I need to talk about something I rant to my computer.
If you are reading this, let me give you some background. I have had anxiety and panic disorder since I was really young, and I recently relapsed last year. Lately, it's been driving me crazy. I have kind of this trapped feeling that I can't get rid of even though I keep running through all the things I tell myself.
What are you even worried ABOUT?
Don't think about yesterday or tomorrow, or tonight, just focus on right now.
There's nothing to be worried about.
You're going to be fine.
In past circumstances, telling myself things like this has worked, but not lately. I can't find a way to get rid of that feeling, or more, the thoughts I have. I've been thinking a lot about death?? It might be because of a death that happened recently, but I don't know. Sometimes I feel like maybe dying would be getting something over with, but then an hour later, I don't want to die, but then I won't feel good physically and suddenly I'm convinced I'm going to.
You know what really drives me crazy though?
Not knowing what happens after death.
I feel like if I knew, it would be so much easier just to ignore it until I got there. I'm not a particularly religious person. I don't know if I believe that if you follow a certain religion the right way you go live up in the sky with big fluffy clouds and golden pillars everywhere.
Anyways, this is driving me crazy, but hopefully having written this will help.
-RGS
No comments:
Post a Comment